This I had to publish................
Dear sir,
Herewith please find a formal requisition of your services. Said services are to be understood to include, but not be limited to, technical advice, carpentry & metalwork skills, general knowledge, etc.
The requestor of such services has found himself to be in a position whereby he is lacking the necessary and particular skills to perform a specified task. The aforementioned task has recently come to light after the acquisition of specific electronic merchandise, which, for the purposes and intent of this requisition, shall be referred to as Audio Visual Equipment, hereafter AVE. Said AVE is normally, but not in all cases, installed in the three dimensional space below a television
viewing screen, usually and/or often inside a cabinet or furniture unit of some varied pecification. However, in the supplied documentation of said AVE, there are specific warnings about the operating temperature of said device, and upon manual investigation, these recommendations have been confirmed to be accurate. Said AVE generates a lot of exothermic radiation, otherwise or commonly known as 'heat', and the aforementioned unit of furniture intended to house said AVE doesn't seem to display properties of adequate exothermic radiation dispersal.
With this preamble now performed, herewith the request: The requestor solicits your services to manufacture, construct or erect a mechanism that attaches to the current audio visual equipment unit of furniture - for the purpose of the newly acquired AVE to reside upon.
In common parlance this might be referred to as a 'bracket & shelf on the side', if you wish.
The requestor would appreciate a timely response to your availability,
or not as the case may be.
Sincerely,
LW Cowle
All he wants is help with a small bloody shelve on the side of his TV cabinet....................
4 comments:
LW COWLE DESERVES A LOT OF CREDIT FOR THAT IT SURE MAKES ME THINK THAT LWC THINKS HIS DAD IS BRILLIANT CLEVER AND EVEN HAS A BIT OF HUMOR.
Bliksem, I am impressed! Where did you come up with it? I had to look up some words in the dictionary??!!Moeks
Not withstanding the application for services, but the quality and specifics to detail on the works request. This shelf will be something else and must be perfect. Can you just imagine what the clients complaint form would look like, if this is the application for works. MUST be done right first time on time and within budget.
lEON, you are quite within your rights to provide specs and put them in writing. I say this because I have been caught before on just what you have requested, then the guy that is applying to do the job, none other than W.J. Cowle Jr has the audacity to call your requirements 'a bloody shelf'. I would find this very disconcerting and would have sleepless nights about the applicant doing the job if he calls your request 'just a bloody shelf'. Is he the right man to use? From personal experience, and I repeat personal, YES, it has happened to me, I had said 'just a bloody shelf' put up in my bathroom on a farm in Whiteriver, none other than Barnone Farm. The finished job looked straight, I might add WAS straight when a spirit level was put on it to see if it was straight before the final screw was screwed in. I personally was holding the shelf to keep the level. The final screw was screwed in with much sweat and a few swear words, unrepeatable here as youngsters may view the contents hereof. The labourer that did ALL the work asked for a beer in hand to view his handiwork and marvel at just how good he was. I was so excited the shelf was now up after much nagging, and placed the first object on the shelf...namely, a pair of scissors. With the weight of the scissors, the said, absolutely level shelf, came crashing onto the now clean floor. The handymans reason for such a catastrophe was that the bloody walls were never built properly and can't hold screws!!
As God is my witness this is an absolutely true story...signed by Carol on the 16th day of January 2009 now residing in Nelspruit.
Post a Comment